and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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