For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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