I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
