Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
