4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize