Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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