Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
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One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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