we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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