The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize