Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
