Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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