Having a random hookup so left but love u
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
