Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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