Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
