this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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