I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
