We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
