had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
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get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
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it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.