that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize