Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
We don't watch enough power rangers
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
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