her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
