I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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