Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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