By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
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