im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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