YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
