I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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