JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
