How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize