i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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