he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
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