also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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