ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
