i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
