At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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