Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
