Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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