yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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