I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I have tasted many bathrooms
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
