billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
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