Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
