We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Randomize
