how can u be prego again
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
