i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
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Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
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After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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