I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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