She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize
