I am in a vortex of obligation.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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