I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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