i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
God, I missed his penis.
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