Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
