so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize